Words of Warning

Wizard Water^©, like any medicine, must be used with care. Do not take more than the recommended amount. Do not apply it in concentrated doses to any organic matter, living or dead, without a doctor's supervision, unless I am well away from town.

Above all, do not spill it!

One of my clients carelessly uncorked a bottle of Wizard Water^© while sitting on his bed, scattering elixir all over the mattress. Soon the feathers inside that mattress quadrupled in size. Unable to stand the pressure, the ticking split open. The stuffing spilled out and began to multiply. The activity continued thus until the poor man was hip-deep in feathers. He escaped, but the feathers filled the house. He had to wait three weeks before he could reenter his own home -- and managed to do so only because the weather turned cold and the plumes flew south. He tried to get a reimbursement from me for the contents of his good feather mattress, but I refused. I will not be held responsible for customer carelessness. Besides, come summer they might return home to roost.

copyright ©2011 Laurie J. Anderson, all rights reserved.